..Wigan Dialect

A Collection of Lancashire Dialect Poems, Photographs, Phrases & Sayings from around the Wigan area. By Jeff Unsworth

El Toopay ( Translation )


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Hell To Pay ( Toupee )

It started with a bald spot.
About as big as half a crown.
Then it got much bigger.
And worked it's way around.
Everytime I had a bath.
Or washed my hair at night ( neet)
I 'd look down onto the floor
There would be hair all round my feet.

Falling out in chunks it was.
Bald as a coot on top.
And then I tried a toupee.
It looked just like a mop.
I said I would'nt wear it.
The wife said it looked all right
I said that folk would laugh at me
Because it looked a sight.

She got her way, I wore it.
It was stuck on with tape and pinned.
But everybody laughed at me.
It blew off in the bloody wind

Wigan Dialect Copyright © 1998 Jeff Unsworth

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